Been down this road....

I don't like this road. AT. ALL.

Last Saturday was Tristan and Grayson's last game together. Multiple people have said "Oh, you'll see them - don't worry - it'll be fine - it's not like he died"... while this is true... it's a knife in the wound.

See, this is the 3rd very close family that we've lost.  I thought initially, I'll still see my friend, their kids, etc. and sadly, we don't.  Ever.

I get it though.  Our kids are in different schools, play different sports... they get new friends, new interests, etc.  There is only so much time in the day, so many hours in the weekend.  Different friends = different play dates.

Different isn't inherently bad, it's part of life.  But, I've had to watch Tristan cry and ask over and over and over "WHY can't I got to TCA?  Now ALL of my best friends are together and I'm left behind."  And that's true.  Tristan has five boys in the 2nd grade with him. FIVE. In the entire grade. ONE plays sports. Thank you Lord that Braeden can play at least two sports with him!!

As I told Tristan, we will see Grayson once in a while but this is our new normal.  Once a month vs. once a day for 3 years is hard for him.  It's hard for me.

So, I'm letting him feel sad. I'm letting myself feel sad and then we will expectantly wait, to see what God does and even if we don't ever know WHY... we will be content. We will do our best to find new friends and we will step outside of our introverted selves and we will be ok.

We will miss the Mays at school and on the field.  They have been great friends, almost family and for that I will be forever grateful.